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Photo of Ian F. Mann

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How to tell your children you are getting a divorce

Though you feel a divorce is the best way forward for your family, it is never easy to tell your children that your marriage is over.

You and your soon-to-be ex-spouse should work out a thoughtful way to tell the kids that you plan to split up. Here are three tips on how to break the news to your kids in a healthy manner.

1. Make a plan

Although you and your ex no longer wish to stay together, you will need to co-parent your kids for years to come. Develop a plan on how and when to talk with your children about your divorce. Work together to find a time when everyone is home and there are few distractions. Sit everyone down and let them know that you have a serious matter to discuss and need their full attention. Then, carefully explain that your marriage has ended.

2. Discuss the future

Be honest with all family members about what the future holds. Specifically, discuss

  • Whether you plan to sell the family home
  • When one or both parents will move out
  • Whether they will attend new schools
  • Outline your parenting plan

3. Reassure your children

Kids crave stability, so reassure your children that after the initial changes, life will go back to a similar routine. Also, remind them that both parents will always love and be there for them.

Your children should remain your top priority throughout your divorce. Remember to work together with your ex to let your kids know how loved they are.


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